Despite my almost two week hiatus, I haven’t seen much drop in my daily traffic and I even had a spike on the 11th (was I linked somewhere? It was very odd…). The hiatus was nothing intentional, actually, though I have always struggled with coming up with something to write about everyday of the week. Despite my activity in the diabetes community, I actually get quite burned out talking about my own life with diabetes. There have been more pressing worries whirling around in my head and up until this weekend I thought I’d have no respite.
I had pretty intense bout of homesickness this past week, which I think was largely caused with returning from two weeks in Oregon and going right back into my rut routine of long days at work followed by a nonexistent social life.
It was the first time in the seven months since I moved here that I actually thought all of this was a mistake.
And it’s hard to talk about this because I don’t want people to worry about me or ask me a lot of questions or wonder if I’m going to quit my job and move back to Oregon. I’m not, trust me. So I’ve avoided the blog the past ten days because there was nothing else in my head except how sad I was and how much I dread the weekend because it’s so hard.
But slowly (oh so slowly) things are starting to turn around.
For one, I joined Meetup.com, which is a website that helps people find others who share similar interests. I signed up for a New York group for people with type 1, but I haven’t had a chance to go any of the meet-ups because of other obligations. Once New Year’s hit, I signed up for more local groups – a couple groups for young women and a group for people who like to try new restaurants. I’ve only gone to one meet-up so far – a lunch at a Thai restaurant – and I hope to go to more soon.
This past weekend, I worked a bit more on my 101 in 1,001 Days Challenge. On Friday night, I watched Charlie Wilson’s War, which I thought was great, and then on Sunday, Gayle (one of the OC’s many readers) and I went to The Delta Grill in Manhattan for some good New Orleans cooking. Saturday night was Game Night at the practically-waterfront apartment of another friend, with a picture-perfect view of the Manhattan skyline. It was a uniquely busy weekend and a wonderful and much-needed reminder of why I wanted to come here.
But now the week has started again and I’m once again wishing the week would slow down a bit because I have no plans for the weekend other than doing a load of laundry and paying a visit to Trader Joe’s. When people at work would ask me what I did over the weekend, I would reply, “Oh, not much. Did laundry, watched TV. Just hung around.” They would smile and say, “Oh it’s so nice to have quiet weekends.”
I’ve debated over and over again about whether or not I wanted to write about this topic again. It seemed like I had ground the “loneliness” topic into the ground, and this certainly has nothing to do with my diabetes. Diabetes has been rather typical with its up and downs lately and hasn’t really caused any major red alarms in the past couple of weeks. I suppose the relative monotonous drone of diabetes has allowed the loneliness to move into center stage. I almost long for the days when I focused solely on my issues with diabetes.
I know I’m the one who wanted to move clear across the country, and I am glad that I’m here. I just didn’t realize how hard this was going to be.